The Breast Chronicles

The Breast Chronicles

Reshaping breasts on the net.
The latest fashion trend among celebs (notably the medium to small breasted) is to flash a bit of 'side cleavage' - something their larger-breasted cousins might not be able to get away with so easily. Jennifer Lopez and

The risk when a woman's bra size changes - either through weight loss or gain or out-of-control hormones - is that she will be reluctant to get rid of her old, perfectly servicable (if slightly ill-fitting) bras. I'm speaking from personal experience here - I hate the thought of throwing away between 50 and 100 quids' worth of old bras. Anyway, I just heard from a young lady whose bra size has also recently dropped from a 32DD (my new size), offering me her old bras in order that they shouldn't go to waste. She also enquired whether I knew about any official scheme for such swaps/donations. Well, while I don't know of any, I do think it would be a marvellous idea as I'm sure it would help ensure that more women were wearing bras of the correct size because their unwillingness to get rid of old bras would be reduced.

Hm, free breast implants for female soldiers... I can only assume that this is to cut costs on kitting them out with kevlar armour - put 'em on the front line and watch the bullets bounce off! Or alternatively they could be after some sort of 'fembot'-style secret weapon... machine gun jubblies?! (witty comments courtesy of Mark and Krill).

The Breast Chronicles have made it into the Top 40 Chart! Unfortunately you have to be a registered user to view the top 40 chart, so I just have to take their word for it...

Breasts: natural or sexual selecton? Round, firm breasts may have evolved for a rather different reason than conventionally believed by (surprise - male) scientists. "The obsession with the breast as a sexual object ensured very large gaps in our knowledge of its true function," British researcher Gillian Bentley is convinced especially, she says, in light of the fact that not all cultures eroticize breasts to the same degree. She suggests that the female breast evolved in this way in order to avoid suffocating nursing infants.

Update on the bra ball story: The artist Nicolino is going to drive his bra ball - constructed from 14,000 bras - across California behind his pink Cadillac... artists eh!

Gem ("Hawaiian Punch in Cocktail Glasses") is not only cool, but she writes about her breasts and she's linked to The Breast Chronicles (including links to several individual articles) on Her recent journal entry / article details a bra-shopping trip undertaken with 'sister #3' who does not share the genes which endowed her with magnificent mammaries. Entertaining and amusing.

New bra holster is equal parts Victoria's Secret, Guns & Ammo. Now women can carry a weapon strapped to their bra, instead of in their purse, which will usually be the first thing to be taken from them in any hold-up situation... whatever next eh!

I bought a new bra today: a 32DD by Triumph. I've been noticing that my 34s have been starting to feel looser on me (I've lost some weight recently), so I think I'm going to be a 32 now. As for the cup size, I do know that Triumph tend to be quite generous, so I don't know if I'll be a DD or E. is a website supporting breast cancer charities. Several artists have contributed decorated moulds of their own - or someone else's - breasts, which are being auctioned off at the site, to raise money. They're all so creative - celebrate boobage!

Bra posters go 3-D in an advertising campaign for the bioform bra. Company chairman Graham Kerr says that the unique posters "seemed the most effective way to show the primary benefit of the Bioform which is the way in which it shapes a woman's bust."

I just went shopping at Asda, and noticed a sign outside proclaiming that their Tickled Pink Campaign to raise money for breast cancer care managed to raise over 350,000! Which is nice.

The Gossard-sponsored National Cleavage Week III is over. And what a mammorable week of fun it's been. A host of busty beauties proudly puffed out their chests in a brazenly confident but oh-so politically incorrect display of feminism. These women know how to play up their natural assets with wild eye-catching effects. They are comfortable with, even worshipful of, their own sensuality and womanliness and use it to control social situations. Granted, I don't think that these women should solely rely on their devastating decolletage. Intelligence is vital. However, combining intelligence and an "if you've got it, flaunt it" kind of confidence not only allows us to be feminine again, it also allows each of us to begin to define just what femininity means. Femininity, just like feminism, is becoming a very individual term.

What a handful ... Miss Cleavage 2001 strikes the classic superstar pose. Women celebrities - from bad girls to the girl next door - all do it. The topless-but-covering-her-breasts-with-her-hands pose that manages to boggle men's minds and mitts. Very hot!

The Jug-o-meter contest is now open for voting. I myself will be very interested to see who wins the hearts of the nation's blokes, to be honest. Personally I'd go for Anna, but I have a suspicion that the bleached blonde, artificially augmented, beanpole Toni might capture the attention of the average eye-candy-oriented FHM reader.

You just don't think you can compete the cleavage you see busting out for National Cleavage Week III. What's a 34B to do? Answer, the pneumatic bra which allows women to pump up their chests to more than twice their original cup size! Based on the principles of a car airbag (this could mean anything from "bag containing air" to "explosive inflation under violent deceleration") it crams the breasts upward and inward. A cresent-shaped airbag in the bottom of each cup replaces roundness in the area where the breast would normally rest. So the bra takes two small whole breasts and turns them into halves of two larger breasts. Plainly unsuitable for pneurotics.