The Breast Chronicles

The Breast Chronicles

Reshaping breasts on the net.
Beware: don't put your underwired bras through the washing machine!

What is 'average'? There's a whole article on it in the Webzine here. When declaring an average, should we work out the mean or median bra size sold? Or should we work out the average volume in cc of breasts? Should we take into account body weight and build? Should we be aware that a C-cup on a size 32 frame is rather different from a C-cup on a size 42 frame.

"I have another theory on the 'Why Men Like Big Breasts' issue... supposedly breasts get slightly larger when a women is turned on, so it's as if busty women are always sexy and willing" --Atilla

Now here's a thing: another website called The Breast Chronicles! It's about a woman's experiences of breast cancer and beyond.

Yes, I do think that Thora has big boobs. Perhaps she went on the pill or something, because she's certainly developed since American Beauty! I for one will be interested to see how Hollywood reacts to her new body - I have mentioned on several occasions the abundance of small-breasted women in Tinseltown, and the lack of busty mainstream actresses (certainly non-implanted ones).

More on bra sizing: "The band size is an estimate of how the breasts should rest on the body. If the breasts are higher, fuller, and protrude in front of the body, the band size should be lowered by as much as two to three inches. If the breasts are wider across the chest (common after breastfeeding) then the bandsize may need to be increased by one or two inches." (posted in the gbook by Dwiv). Well that explains something I've wondered about - how sometimes after breast augmentation surgery, a woman's bra band size can move up. It's because after the operation the breasts are often wider across their chest than previously.

Okay, we finally have a mainstream Hollywood actress with big boobs: teenaged American Beauty star Thora Birch has got one helluva rack on her - she certainly won't be needing the boob job she was talking about through the film!

First of all, thank you so much to everyone who has e-mailed or posted their support. Now hopefully we can move back to the original point of this site, which was almost starting to get lost! The discussion of the female breast... To boldly blog what no site has done before...

Every so often, Metafilter comes up with some breast-related topics. This one on Bloussant breast enhancement tablets has some quite informed comments attached. Information - including movie files of their television advert - can be found at the Bloussant website.

Possible response #1: Okay, yes, I admit it. I have average breasts. In fact, I'm practically flat-chested. The fact that I fit into 34E bras is neither here nor there - it doesn't mean that I actually have 34E breasts... Silly me, what was I thinking? There I was, believing that my bra size actually represented the size of my breasts in any way. Thank you so much for putting me right on that!

Possible response #2: Until you have met me in real life and have had the opportunity to personally size up my breasts, please refrain from trying to claim you know them better than I know them myself. If you are in doubt, please feel free to read what Ash has to say about it in the gbook.

"Boobs are like trainsets: they're meant for the kids but their dads play with them" --Adam

More on the UK/US sizing systems: a US DD-cup is the same as an E-cup - the two (generally) are interchangeable, and often in charts it will show "D, DD(E), DDD(F), G". In the UK, however, DD is a size on its own, so the system goes "D, DD, E, F" (DDD is uncommon in UK sizing).

And while I'm at it: Do not tell me how I should see my own breasts. They are mine. Each woman needs to be able to learn to love her own breasts, without fear of intervention from people who have nothing to do with them. Going up to a woman in the street and telling her "you're flat-chested" would be unacceptable. Likewise, no-one but me has any right to decide how I should view my own breasts. And let me reiterate: do not presume to know my breasts better than I do.

Apparently we can't move on... Look, the reason I don't have breasts the size of someone's head is because I am not fat. As the woman gets larger, the same cup size will represent a bigger breast. My breasts are three cup sizes above the average, so don't tell me they aren't large. They're not enormous, because I'm quite slim, but they're not average.

Yes, my breasts are normal. No, they are not average. Now can we move on?

Let's have some examples eh? Julia Roberts is a 34B - they tried to maximise her assets in the movie Erin Brockovich (from which this still was taken) to make her look as large as possible. Jade James (UK model) is a 34B/C. Kelly Brook is a 32E and a lingerie model at that. Sarah Michelle Gellar apparently wears a 36C (I forget where I read that - if I were guessing I would go for a B-cup). I am a 34E. Just trust me okay? Or else, you prove that I would fit better in a 36B than a 34E.

Look, I am aware that a 31" chest measurement supposedly corresponds to a 36 band size, but just take my word for it yeah, I am definitely not a 36 - they just hang off me! The only way of finding a bra that truly fits is to try it on, measuring systems are - not to put too fine a point on it - rubbish: I have come out variously as a 36B, 36C, 32G, 34F using different methods. I mean for fuck's sake, do you really think I don't know my own bra size? If I owned a 36B bra I would take a photo of me wearing it - but it's sooo far from my size that I don't have any in my possession! Anyone with eyes can tell by looking at me that I'm not a B-cup. Jeez.

By the way, according to Cameo Intimates, I seem to be a G-cup. My measurements are as follows: underbust 31; bust 38. Dispute me if you wish. (And yes, I am aware that this supposedly makes me a 36 band size according to many measuring systems, but just trust me on that one okay?)

"What it comes down to is finding the bra that truly fits you. One that fits properly, not the way you think it ought to fit. It took my wife months to get used to a bra that actually fit right b/c she'd worn an ill fitting bra for so long. Don't worry about the size or the whether or not it looks good with the dress or blouse you like so much. Get one that fits!!!!! You'll find it is such a relief to just be comfortable." --CyberPlainsDrifter (see the guestbook for the full post - I hope he doesn't mind me quoting him here!)

Three new articles are available for your interest and enjoyment!

Are you wearing the right size bra? What with all this debate, I thought it might be time to address the issue. If your bra doesn't feel entirely comfortable, the likely reason is that you are not wearing the correct size. Yes, you may have always worn a C-cup, but that doesn't mean it's right. So you think you fit perfectly well into all your C-cup bras? That could be just because you've stretched them so you think they fit. Have you ever had yourself measured, or tried on larger sizes to check the fit? I thought my DD bras fit me perfectly before I tried on a 34E. It might also vary between different manufacturers: I wear a 34F in Freya, but in Fantasie I fit perfectly well into a 34E. Keep it in mind, and if I inspire one reader to go and fit herself properly I will consider this website a success!

Okay, now I'm confused! Feminine Charms seems to use the British bra sizing system, where DD is a cup size in its own right, and DDD equates to E. Argh!

By the way, for those of you who doubt my word on my bra size... Kelly Brook is a much-celebrated 32E.

Wow, the things that are being searched on the Breast Chronicles! Thank you to the person who sent many search strings complimenting me and my site!

Perhaps I should add an introduction saying something like "Welcome to the Breast Chronicles: breasts for their own sake from a feminine point of view. Men are welcome to stay, but be aware that this site is not intended for you so do not write and complain"..? So many of the entries I post on this site seem to be explaining that, after all!

There are quite a few new articles waiting to be published here. Once again, if you sent me an article which hasn't yet appeared, please write to me and let me know how you would like your by-line to read (e.g. name, e-mail/url link).

So now I've had an e-mail declaring that I'm "a C-cup at best" - so you're suggesting I'm probably nearer a B? Riiiiight... I haven't fitted a B-cup since I was 12. I am offended at being accused of lying. Seeing as I started this site primarily to celebrate big boobs and help other women come to terms with theirs as I have with mine, I find that rather insulting. Why would I build the site on a farce? As for the supposed 'lack' of photographs, I will say this: I don't want the site to be about pictures, which is why they are quite rare and you actually have to look for them, not just skim through and hope to be titilated with suggestive imagery. wow. It's women obsessed with their lingerie! The site includes a multitude of bra and underwear reviews in the 'Fitting Room'; 'Top Drawer memoires' including comments on life with or without a bust; and 'Fetish', where various contributors share their views on their favourite styes of underwear! If you are a lingerie-fetishist like me, you will so love this site - I've never seen such a comprehensive site devoted entirely to underwear =)

Well, I must say that the reports generated by the site search engine have been quite revealing. I'm disappointed, in a way - I created this site to be about the celebration of breasts as something more than sex objects. And yet the most popular searches are for pictures and sex. There are even searches for 'pussy', 'panties' and 'bestiality' for Christ's sake - this is a CLEAN site, people! Also, why so many people have bothered to input searches for the words 'breast', 'boobs' and 'tits' I don't understand - there isn't a single page on this site where breasts are not mentioned!

On the theme of advertising, Nike has released an advert reminding fitness fanatics of the importance of wearing a good sports bra when you exercise. Women are reminded that "exercise can tone every muscle in your body... except the one in your breast". The ad - depicting a pair of naked breasts - has been somewhat controversial - readers of womenswire share their opinions on the matter. Personally, although I'm fundamentally against naked breasts in ad campaigns (as a simple attention-grabber I feel that it underrates breasts for women's own sake), I feel that any controversy is basically unjustified and the ad is not really exploitative at all.

One woman shares the history of her boobs - from age 5 when she realised that taking one's top off was a significant part of seduction through the 'growing pains' of puberty, to her decision to get her nipples adorned with metal (ouch!). The article makes really quite a fascinating read as a 'personal breast' tale of insecurity and acceptance.

Woo, yet another new article in the Webzine! The Breasts in my Camera is about breasts from an aesthetic, artistic point of view.

There are other articles waiting for publication in the Breast Chronicles webzine. I haven't forgotten about them - they will be added to the site soon. The only thing is, I have not made a note of who sent me the articles. If you have sent me an article and it has not yet appeared on the webzine, please write again, describing your article and let me know how you would like your credit line (name, e-mail or web link etc). Thanks.

I've been trying to find adverts aimed at larger-breasted women (from brands like Fantasie or Freya). I'm not even sure whether or not they exist, but if anyone can help out - or provide any other breast- or lingerie-related material (I've got all the relevant stuff from - do e-mail the webzine.

Working on this new section.. I've discovered that I don't like Victoria's Secret adverts. The models in them are presented as sex 'objects' with vacant expressions and breathy voices, draping themselves over the furniture... it's like the ads aren't even aimed at women! Contrast this with the 'Trina' advert from Triumph International. To be honest, the VS adverts actually put me off the company, even though I've always thought they have some nice stuff.

There is to be a new addition to the Breast Chronicles site - a 'media' section, with downloads including breast-cancer and lingerie adverts. Hopefully that won't result in any copyright issues, though considering it's free advertising I wouldn't have thought so!

Hurrah, there's finally a search function on the site! Scroll down the menu to search the site. *Note: the search wasn't working when I tried it just now - it might take a short while before it starts working (it is only just installed, after all).

The feedback I've had on the nipple question is quite varied. Some have expressed a wish for proportion, others a desire for either large or small areolae. It is my belief that the models featured in the mainstream glamour world (Playboy and similar magazines) tend to have smaller nipples because they so frequently have artificially augmented breasts; natural big boobs (such as are featured in magazines called Score and Voluptuous, I'm told) usually have larger areolae. This is only a vague rule that I have made based on my own research and experiences - it doesn't mean that small breasts with large nipples (or vice-versa) are either unusual or abnomal.

Today I received two new articles to go into the Breast Chronicles Webzine! Bust Dreams and American television, censorship and breasts are both extremely well-written, and definitely worth a read. While I was updating the 'zine, I also added the long-awaited expanded and extended version of the old 'breast sex' article - it is now in two parts, advice for men and advice for busty women (and their partners).

The breasts and I spent most of yesterday evening being photographed by a lovely and very charming photographer =) Perhaps if you're good I'll post some on the Breast Chronicles, but the main purpose is to have a range of pictures to send to FHM for the Jug-o-meter contest.

Yeah, sure - I'm lying about my bra size! Odd then, that my 34F Freya bra fits so well then...

The current issue of - an online teen magazine - is about health and body. It includes articles on making sure you wear the right bra, and skinny models. If you are self-conscious about your big breasts or small chest, there's an article containing tips for dressing to disguise the parts you dislike. Incidentally, if you do happen to sign up to kiwibox, do quote me as your referrer - my username is honey_ryder.

Tara sports an impressively perky pair of F-cups. But, is it just me or do her nipples look small in proportion to her boobs? Do men prefer small nipples (areolae)? I've noticed that playboy models seem on average to have relatively small nipples. Any thoughts on the matter?

Report: The Perfect Breasts documentary was pretty much about the act of getting a boob job. Interviewed were women - mostly who had got breast enlargements in their late teens - who described their experiences and their own reasons behind their decision. I felt that the programme could have concentrated a little more on societal pressures to have a 'perfect' body, and perhaps was a little too in favour of breast implants. Footage of an actual operation was shown, revealing more of the 'inner workings' of breasts than most people have seen!

The Channel four documentary is going to be on TV in about half an hour. I will make notes and report back after I have watched it!

For your information, I am currently working on designs for 'Breast Chronicles' merchandise, and intend to launch the cafepress store very soon!

You gotta love Linsey McKenzie's all-natural 34GG breasts! They're really quite astonishing. She's from the UK, too.

To anyone who has submitted an article to the webzine within the last month or so: as I have been on holiday recently, any files sent to me may have been lost in the depths of my webmail inbox. If you feel that you have been neglected, please resend your article and I will make every effort to get it published directly.

The documentary Perfect Breasts is going to be shown at 10:00pm tomorrow Tuesday 9th January. Thanks to Digger, who found this out for me!

There is to be a documentary shown on Channel four called Perfect Breasts, examining the pressures on women to conform to male standard 'ideals' about their breasts and studying the cosmetic surgery industry. I don't know when it is going to be broadcast, so when I find out I will post further information here. This reminds me that there is a documentary on Sky one which is repeated every so often - if anyone could look out for when it is next on and let me know I would be grateful.

More on the teenager wanting breast implants. Defending her wish, she declares that ”every other person you see on the television has had implants. If I want to be successful I need to have them too — and I do want to be successful, though I don’t know at what at the moment". Ann Widdecome, in a rare burst of wisdom, commented that "I think it is shameful that this girl is being encouraged to put looks and image above the more important things in life at such a young age".

So why haven't the people at FHM got back to me? Hmmm...

Woohoo - Sale time is here! Double-D, Victoria's Secret and Brief Look all have their January sales on now! I've already bought two bras in the sales - one of the benefits of having a less-than-usual back/cup size combination is that they're usually the ones left in the sales! =)

It's distressing when a 15-year-old girl thinks that the best way of improving her quality of life is to get breast implants. It's sad when a teenager thinks "You need breasts to be successful". In my opinion, girls as young as this should not be allowed to have breast implants as a simple 'quick fix' option - at least without extensive counselling or something! My thoughts are more detailed than that - perhaps I will expand this entry or add more on the matter later. Read what other people think.

The difference between British and American bra sizing is fairly simple. In Britain, DD is a cup size in its own right, between D and E, whereas in America DD and E are synonymous. So as my bra size is 34E/F in Britain, it would be 34F(DDD)/G in America - gosh that sounds scary! [Note: although this site used to carry the byline "the life and times of a pair of 34DD breasts", I have since come to the realisation that they are actually larger than a DD.]

Wow, it was certainly worth posting the challenge! This lovely chap sent me links to a whole load of front-fastening bras available in sizes upwards of a 34DD. I particularly like this one, the Sensuence bra by Inchant, which is available in cup sizes A up to J! (though the variety in back sizes diminishes towards the larger end of the scale). This Glamorise one is also attractive, and available up to an F cup.

Okay, here's a challenge for you: find an attractive front-fastening bra which is available in a 34E... Preferably one that's not a maternity bra! You see, there are some very pretty bras in larger cup sizes, but the little people still get vastly more variety: in bigger sizes, there's one all-over lace bra; one satin basque; one sheer cup style... And there are loads of styles (especially sexy, kinky ones) available for small boobs that are nowhere to be found in E+ cup sizes! Don't anyone ever complain again that your breasts are too small! And I mean that.