The Breast Chronicles
Reshaping breasts on the net.
Frequently Asked Question #93: How can I make my girlfriend come by caressing her breasts alone? Answer: You most likely can't. I happen to be among the majority of women who cannot be stimulated to orgasm with just their breasts. Caressing my breasts helps me to climax, but it won't work by itself. It actually happens that as a rule, large-breasted women are likely to have less
sensitive breasts than our small-breasted sisters. However, if there is to be any hope of achieving this, ask her
what she likes, not me!
Do you think that this chainmail bikini
could accommodate my assets? The Playboy Store
is unfortunately woefully inadequate in catering for the more amply-endowed: all the bras I saw were available only in cup sizes B and C - talk about limited selection!
Just a quick hello to Pete...
Whoever found this website using the search string "large natural boobies" was probably taken by surprise (as I was!) by this page on Boobies of the Galapagos Islands
! I thought it was worth a link for comedy value! ;-)
The winter ball is coming up... I'm trying to decide what to wear. Should I go semi-transparent with panels of sheer fabric? Should I just go all out on the cleavage front with a low-cut neckline? Or should I attempt to defy gravity in a backless number?
Prompted by the arrival of the variable cleavage
wonderbra, the article Supporting Roles
examines the 'cleavage culture' in society today. Is breast enhancement for male or female benefit? Well I really can't say, but I don't need a pneumatic bra to enjoy the effects of abundant cleavage! ;-)
It's funny that people keep commenting on how obsessed I am with breasts. This site is called "The Breast Chronicles" - but people still think it's odd that they're all I write about! I happen to be obsessed with my face, stomach, hair and legs too, but I chose to write about my breasts - partly because I knew it would generate the most interest (I mean, who would visit a site devoted to the discussion of my stomach?!)
hm, my e-mail to FHM seems to have had some trouble sending - I have a message from their mail server telling me it's been delayed.
I have to admit that it quite infurates me when men objectify the 'ideal' breasts. I've just come across possibly the most sexist, male chauvenist site I've ever seen, comparing celebrities and models based on body parts! It says things like "her breasts are not firm or perky enough", but favours a more generous bust. Now really. MEN!!!
One week to go until my 21st birthday! Any presents will of course be welcome - Double-D.com
, Maple Drive
and Playboy Store
have a delightful selection of lingerie and accessories gift ideas ;-)
I have just sent a 3mb e-mail to Dave at FHM - he has
to notice that
, surely! So with a bit of luck, I should be appearing on fhm.com
any day now... eventually you'll be able to vote for me in the jug-o-meter contest.
If the rumours pan out, Elizabeth Hurley will become the world's highest-paid lingerie model in a three million pound deal
with the makers of the gel-filled Ultimo bra! That's what you get for working your assets, now let's see who criticises her for turning up to film premieres flashing cleavage...
Do you consider that there is pressure upon women to have 'perfect' breasts? Small is too small, but big is too big. Vast numbers of women get breast augmentation operations every year - 132,378 in 1998 - in order to look 'more womanly' or 'more in proportion'. According to these statistics
, over half as many go for breast reduction surgery, which is a more expensive and complicated procedure with a longer recovery time.
My housemates are the best
What's a 36C? It's the average American bra size. Here's what it means: The number 36 refers to the bra's band size in inches. The letter C is the cup size - how 'deep' the breast is. To determine a bra size, find a tape measure and then find a woman. Take the tape measure and put it directly above her bust at underarm level. Add two to an even number; three to an odd number (please note that this may not always give the correct size - some women find that they fit better into a band size close to their actual measurement; some find that adding 4 or 5 to the underbust measurement makes for a more comfortable fit). That's the band size: the length of the strap that goes around the back. To figure the cup size, measure again, but this time right across the peaks. Subtract the underbust measurement from the new figure to get the difference in inches. If there's no difference, she's an AA (you'll know she's flat-chested if a triangle bikini wrinkles over her chest!
), a one-inch difference makes her an A, two inches a B, and so on to 5 inches for a DD (now you know why they're called bikini fillers!
So, it seems that I was
correct on Laeticia's cup size after all! According to her official website
she wears a 36D bra, though she has them specially made for a perfect fit. Well that's reassuring - I like to think I'm pretty good at guessing...
Ruth and I had great fun taking some photos to send to FHM yesterday. I posed in my silver bikini, Victoria's Secret bustier, red 34E bra, tight T-shirt, the top I made myself... I felt good, and I looked good. Damn, my breasts are great! ;-)
"Larger Breasts in 90 Days Guaranteed!" Yeah right, herbal pills that make your breasts grow. You take six pills a day for three or four months and voila! You're Jayne Mansfield. If you want to gamble....
Here's two opinions on Breasts!
First, a girl who loves the way her breasts fill-out a C-cup. She says "they’re fun to
have" because "they give pleasure to those who look at them, and those who touch them, and most of all, they give pleasure to me." Second, a guy who's grappled with breasts "so big you need two hands just to hold one of those voluptuous twins." No wonder he thinks "they’re so fun to play with."
The university women's officer supports the Breast Chronicles! =)
When it comes to men's preference in breasts, the most commonly-occuring keywords are 'in proportion', 'perky' and 'naked'. They go on about how they prefer a woman's breasts to be 'in proportion' to her body. They say that they prefer 'slightly larger' breasts, but still want them to stick straight out and be unnaturally perky - but they claim to prefer natural boobs over implants. And they say women
make unrealistic and self-contradictory demands!
So what do men really think of implants
? Well the general consensus seems to be leaning towards natural breasts regardless of size, but a preference for slightly larger ones. Or if there are to be implants, they 'have to look natural'. I can be sure that, as these are men talking to men, this is not an engineered discussion.
Another complaint (yeah yeah, another one) I have about my breasts is the gap in the middle. They do not hang off my chest in a neat double-u, there's a small space between them. Because of this I find it hard to achieve that Y-shaped cleavage that even C-cup women can be capable of - I'm also slightly concerned that it increases the possibility of someone mistaking them for implants (augmented women sometimes have a noticable expanse of breastbone between their balloons).
No, you can't have pictures of my breasts. First time in a while that I've had any e-mail asking, and I got two in one day! The boobcam is
going back up... when I get around to it.
In protest against government censorship, some of the girls at danni.com staged an unstrip for freedom
event. I personally believe that disallowing "post-pubescent female breasts" on the internet firstly encourages negativity about breasts in general - children will grow up in a breast-free world, resulting in even more stigma being attached to boobs. Secondly, it seems to condone child porn - pre-pubescent breasts are, it seems, exempt from this rule! All a bit daft, if you ask me - Americans eh?
Well, it seems that I may have overestimated Laeticia's bra size. The Supermodel Guide
puts her in a C-cup - this seems like it knows what it's talking about, whereas I was obviously only estimating. Still, very shapely she is indeed.
I swear my body changes shape from day to day!
The name Laeticia Casta was mentioned in my guestbook. This doesn't disprove my point that big boobs aren't fashionable: Laeticia isn't a high-fashion model, she's a lingerie model, which is an entirely different arena. Certainly she's generously proportioned
in the chest area (but put those ribs away, girl!). She models for Victoria's Secret
(in fact, she modelled the bustier that I got from there), and I can see by the ranges she models that she must be a D-cup (I wouldn't think she's a C, and she's seen in styles that don't go beyond a D, so I don't suppose she's a DD). Lovely girl, I'm sure.
You've heard of the magic 8 ball? Well here's a magic nipple
which predicts your fate in a similar way. Oh, hours of fun...
my bra size... I'm anything from a 34DD (though unfortunately it's actually rare to find a DD that fits) to a 34F. I tend to buy 34E bras now. I recently made the admission to myself that I'm not really a DD. I realised that basically, once you get beyond a D-cup you're into the plus-size ranges anyway! So you might as well be an E or F... you get me?
Silicone-enhanced breasts are so common that they have become a personal gift. They are the perfect foil for my perfectly real and honestly superior jugs. Men see me with my 100% home-grown rack, and they are so appreciative. Artificial boobs have, in a way, increased the value of my own natural breasts because a good pair of God(dess)-given bazookas is such a rarity these days!
Oh, the trials of having big boobs
! This girl needs to visit bravissimo.com
for some big-breast swimwear, for a start! Actually, the best bit about this article from gURL magazine
is the amusing animated gif of breasts being represented by various fruit!
In this mammary-obsessed culture, men and women alike are magnetically drawn to look at breasts
, as I have mentioned in my article The Breast Phenomenon
. Neither gender can fail to react to an impressive rack - men with admiration; women often with envy and/or some disapproval. And it's all circular: society's breast fixation encourages advertisers and magazine editors to feature naked or barely-clad breasts; which in turn fuels the obsession! I still haven't quite decided whether or not it's a good thing, considering that I actually happen to possess
the much-coveted large, natural breasts.
We certainly are a Breast-obsessed Culture
. This article looks into the reasons behind women's decision to get breast augmentation surgery. For many, it's the power thing. It's quite a trip to have all eyes turned towards you - guys are impressed, and girls are envious. Men, even if they're there with a date, find it hard to look away (I'm so thankful that I will never have that trouble with any boyfriend of mine - except if semi-naked woman wanders into his line of sight - and hey, I don't have a problem competing with that!).
I just discovered Trashy Lingerie
. Much to my surprise and delight, it offers cup-sized corsets up to a double-d. It also has a load of funky Christmas gear for Santa's little helpers ;-)
fine french lingerie is worth a mention here - and not just because of the name, either ;-). They have a fair number of lines available in larger sizes
(ranges that go up to or beyond a 38D). My favourite is the Vol de Nuit
, which comes in my size. Website is available as French, European and International versions.
Dresses slashed to the waist and low, low v-necks - the high street stores and designer boutiques are full of them. But for most women, going out for a night without a bra is like going out without shoes on! Splendour.com
is offering a 'frontless' bra
- wide-set cups are attached by a diamanté chain. Unfortunately of course, it is not available in any cup size above C (though you would have thought that it would be us larger women who would need
the extra support more!). The only option remaining for us really is to wear plunging necklines which have in-built support - like the top I made myself recently.
What happened to girls with curves? If the actresses in Hollywood learn one lesson, my hope would be that they would learn that if you just haven't got it, don't try and flaunt it! There are plenty of dress styles that will flatter a sleek physique - but exposing ribs and breastbones isn't nice. Elizabeth Hurley has proven beyond doubt that size isn't everything, it's what you do with it that counts. She's very creative with her medium-size breasts - and has become reknowned for it! You have to love that. Paltrow may steal her thunder
, but Hurley certainly wins the cleavage award!
's new catalogue is now available. It features two great new styles from Warner's: delicately embroidered
and luxuriously lacy
bras. The pictures on the webpage aren't big enough or detailed enough to be able to see them properly, unfortunately.
I am feeling very
A problem for the large-breasted sometimes is how to find a top that will fit and flatter a more generous décolletage. I don't know whether these D-cup
"miracle suits" are supposed to be worn as swimsuits or bodies: they look rather too elaborate and delicate to be dunked in chlorinated or saline water, and have matching skirts suggested. Necklines flatter rather than negatively emphasise a large bust. They are designed for D-cups - on a body size of anything from 10-18. Plus, you just gotta love the little body shape illustrations
The Sex and Breasts article in the Webzine
is shortly to be updated. It is going to be split into two separate articles - one advice for men, one advice for women - and is going to be much more detailed (inevitably making it more explicit).
"Cultivate your curves - they may be dangerous but they won't be avoided" --Mae West
Small-breasted gals can't empathise with this problem, but big-busted lasses may find that when lying on your side, the 'top' breast can hang down uncomfortably. Personally, I tend to sleep with either a cuddly toy or my arm between my breasts, just for comfort's sake. Anyway, the lingerie network has developed the Bedtime Breast Support
to support and separate the breasts while sleeping to provide greater comfort for the well-endowed and prevent cleavage from wrinkling caused by sleeping positions.
Thinking about it... I think I could actually be somewhat flattered if someone asked me if I'd had breast surgery. I suppose it would indicate that my breasts looked good, if someone considered them 'too perfect' to be natural. Of course, if they were asking simply because they thought that breasts this size couldn't possibly be real, I would be rather less thrilled.
is one impressively-bosomed woman who's done very
well for herself thank you very much. It's true that it's glamour modelling (as opposed to one of the more 'respected' careers like acting, singing or modelling), but she certainly knows how to work it. Like me, she was initially uncomfortable with her developing figure
, and feels angry when people accuse her of having had implants
(for the same reason that I am opposed to surgically-enhanced models taking the place of naturally buxom girls such as myself)
Two hundred thousand hits and counting...
Update on the FHM campaign: I've received an e-mail - a forward from Dave McLaughlin. This nice chap wrote to Dave asking why he had not done anything further about getting me and my breasts into the jug-o-meter 2 contest, and he'd replied saying it was because I hadn't got in touch (he obviously hasn't been checking his e-mail very carefully). Anyway, I have written to him again, and hope to be featured someday soon.
Here's an article which really knows what it's talking about. It concentrates on the issue of breast size
, trends and issues. Class quote: "Like most 'stacked' women, her relationship with her breasts is a complex affair, ping-ponging between delight and despair, but never straying too far from dementia".
something I've not seen before! A DD-cup triangle bikini top
- I can wear my favourite bikini style without having to worry about spillage! Body Body
sells a wide range of bikinis, including D- and DD-cup styles.
Chic and sleek Gwyneth Paltrow
and Cameron Diaz
attended the Oscars displaying plunge necklines that showed cleavage down to there and out to there. Problem is... Paltrow and Diaz don't have much to show. The supremely cleavage-challenged Paltrow really worked her underwires as an innocent showgirl in Duets
. Alas, despite the eye-catching enhancement of a very effective Miracle Bra, her performance was described as "too-thin, too-flat-chested-to-be-believable"
. Seems no amount of extra padding can solve Gwynnie's problems (think golfballs in bra)!
Having big breasts is an embarrassing problem
? I'll admit that it's a problem at times, but I'm certainly not embarrassed by it! However, this page has some helpful tips about how to tell if you're wearing the wrong bra size, as well as information about breast reduction surgery.
For those of you who have written to me asking how things are going with FHM
: I am still waiting for an 'entry pack' for the jug-o-meter 2 competition. There are two entrants already featured on the webpage: size 10 Scot Helen Abbot
and surgically-enhanced Toni Latham
. Do you think they're competition for me? I just wish Dave McLaughlin would hurry up and send me the promised entry form.
A common misconception about the busty (another rumour put about by small-breasted women) is that we can't sleep on our stomachs. This isn't in fact true, but why do the small-breasted want to lie on their fronts anyway? It's bad for the back. I'm sure I prefer to sleep in a spoons postion with my man - either his front against my back with his hand cupping one of a breast, or my chest to his back.
by Frederick's of Hollywood
is fantastic isn't it? I'm not sure I could squeeze my assets into those cups though, sadly.
It's slightly off-topic, but the corset was
the forerunner to the bra, so I think that justifies its mention in the Breast Chronicles. I've been researching a little into corestry, as part of my general lingerie project, and I think it would be interesting to try wearing a corset. I think a full-torso one would make great clubwear (though they don't seem to be available to fit DD+ cup sizes) - and I wouldn't have to worry about holding my stomach in either! Axfords
sell a variety of corsets, and includes some information and articles on the subject. Their catalogue features a lot of pictures of women in waist cinchers wandering round with their boobs hanging out!
Hurrah - I have finished making my top! It's made of black stretch velvet, silver satin (for the band) and black beaded fringe trim (the most expensive part of the entire garment!). My housemates were well impressed when I rushed downstairs to show them earlier! It will be going on the boobcam of course (yes, I really will get it back up again soon), but here's a preview photo
Everybody needs a bosom for a pillow - I know that Ash enjoys resting his head on my ample chest. But for those who haven't a woman handy, Bosom Buddies
and Tit Pillows
are helping every man's dream become a reality!
Christmas is on it's way - the party season is almost upon us. Dare to bare in fashionable strappy dresses - wearing a good strapless bra underneath will make you feel more confident and look great. If you're feeling even more risqué, use the trend for underwear as outerwear to flaunt your assets with Silhouette's Clubwear
I've been busy with updates this evening - I've made a new poll, reshuffled the menu bar a little, and added two articles to the webzine
: Lingerie Online
by me, and What is Average?
, a reasoning of what makes an 'average' bust.
Yesterday I spent a lot of time researching bras, lingerie design and fabrics. I also started making some preliminary design drawings. I'm quite excited about the prospect of creating my own underwear - and I will of course report back on my progress as a bra designer!
The hourglass figure
is the absolute ideal, the epitome of femininity. Women envy us our curves - corsets are still surprisingly big business
. Fashion designers promote the hourglass
, creating garments to emphasise the bust, waist and hips. But no-one makes any frickin' clothes for the natural
hourglass, do they? Playboy model-types are seen only as being worth only minimal attire - we're expected to spend our lives wearing only a pair of knickers or draped in sensuous fabrics. But we do have everyday lives too, you know.
Those who develop early are cursed. Those who develop late
are also cursed but in a different way. As I have mentioned before, I am a member of the former category. I started developing
early, around age 9. At puberty, I seemed to blossom I directly to a size C, which got me lots of negative attention - envious looks from girls (though thankfully I never had a problem with boys' taunts). But those who were still shy of a training bra by their twelfth birthday, probably weren't more than an A-cup after they hit puberty. While I was coming to terms with my abundant endowment, members of the Itty-Bitty Titty Committee were struggling to accept their shortcomings. They were the butt of every flat-chested joke: "What do you need a bra for? You've got nothing to hold up!" We'd all like to believe that we're above such shallow concerns, but let's face it: Breasts matter. They've mattered since secondary school, when we first got teased for having "knockers" or "mosquito bites".
Do large melons make small-busted women feel inferior?
Now I have to say that whenever I've bought melons, I've always gone for big, juicy ones! But researchers told Tesco
that women shoppers are subconsciously comparing the larger, fleshy melons to the size of their own breasts and turning their thumbs down, thus resulting in a huge waste of, well, huge melons. So Tesco asked for no more than 1-pound 3-ounce melons, which equates to a C-cup, about half the size of the full-sized melons that would do justice my Double-Ds which are always, unapologetically, in season. So maybe Tesco should have hired me as a spokesperson to get the big melons moving again? Or, packaged melons in pairs? Let's hear from the gentlemen who buy melons...
Triumph International have 'discovered' a new supermodel. Enter Trina
, the next-generation cyberbabe who is the face of their Software
carries a huge range of sizes and styles. Essensuals
is also recommended for its DD+ sizes
is a great site too - with prices below the RRP and plenty of styles available in large cup sizes. All are UK sites... Seeing as we have a bit of a theme developing, I might dedicate an article to reviewing the resources I've found.
has a very good range of lingerie with larger cup-sizes, including some brands and collections I have not seen before. There's something for everyone: a wide range of sizes, and styles to suit all tastes from risqué to practical to glamourous. And they do free postage and packing to mainland UK!
My Bioform bra
is on its second outing today. It's more comfortable than I remember it being - perhaps as it gets more worn in it'll improve. I'll report back on how it is after putting it through the washing machine, too (one of its specifications is that it's machine-wash-friendly - I'm wondering if it might help wear it in a bit).
from Victoria's Secret has arrived! It fits really well, too (a 34DD, despite the fact that according to the Victoria's Secret measuring guide I should be a 36A). It will appear in the boobcam at some point.
Seen one sports bra, seen 'em all? Thankfully, that's not the case any longer. The Boob Brigade 2000 is lucy.com's campaign
to rid women of old sports bras while raising money to fight breast cancer. Those who send their old bras to lucy.com, will receive a "Burn Your Bad Sports Bra" T-shirt and button. The easy-to-use lucy.com Bra Search Tool
- mentioned before on the Breast Chronicles - searches through inventory of more than 100 styles and 22 brands of bras, from sizes 32A to 50DDD.
If your breasts are petites mais jolies, as the French would say, then this American-based restaurant chain
may be interested in hiring you. Hint: it's not Hooters. Lucky me. I'm way, way overqualified!
At the Oscar's 2000 there was a whole lotta' cleavage goin' on!
While Cate Blanchett, Uma Thurman and Angelina Jolie had the nerve to appear in high-cut dresses, Heather Graham, Winona Ryder and Salma Hayek all vied for the Best Cleavage award. But they were no competition for Vanessa Williams whose breasts were "so round, so protrusive, so artificially perfect".
I've been told that my impressive-endowments would make a convincing "after"
photo for so-called "bust enhancers." You've probably seen the ads for these popular herbal supplements
, and even electrical stimulation that promises to turn an A cup into a C cup. But do they really work?
. Bust developers that massage breasts with fine jets of water give you wet breasts, period. So-called firming creams basically moisturise the top layer of breast skin: This may make your breasts feel softer and smoother, but it adds zilch in the way of mass. Doctors say your money would be better spent at the gym. But breasts are made up of fatty and glandular tissue, and no exercise or massage will increase the amount of either. All exercise can do is strengthen the pectoral muscles, which support the breasts (breasts themselves contain no muscles except tiny ones that cause the nipples to become erect). They also say breast implants are the only way to increase size.
"The curve is more powerful than the sword" --Mae West
It's little wonder that most women are wearing the wrong sized bra! According to this method
, I should be wearing a 36B! This one
thinks I'm a 32G. Using Wonderbra's method
I come out as a 36A! Frederick's of Hollywood
and Maple Drive
reckon the same. This is ridiculous! Plus Size Bras
' measuring system is the only one I would recommend - using this, I came out at a 34F, which is almost right (though I do know that I'm an E in Fantasie
, and according to the size comparison chart
, this makes me an F in most other brands).
I was looking around the lingerie department of Marks & Spencer
, and was pleased to note that nearly all their ranges go up to a DD-cup (with, unfortunately, the exception of some strapless and backless styles). I also noticed their 'Flirt' plus-size range, with cup sizes DD to G.
What's life like as a member of the Big Breast Club? Sexy, womanly, womanly! Wearing a tight or cleavage-revealing top will never fail to attract attention from either sex: men find their eyes inexorably drawn to a prominent bust; women will stare, with a look of either jealousy or mild disgust. Maybe that's why a beautiful bustline has always been a woman's sexiest accessory. But if you don't have it, here's how to fake it
- and have guys jaws hitting the floor. But even better than the man-related benefits is the fact that a little (or a lot of) cleavage can make you feel fantastic and fill you with a sexy self-confidence.