The Breast Chronicles

The Breast Chronicles

Reshaping breasts on the net.
 
Tomorrow, the breasts and I do our best Baywatch impression in a red swimsuit. Swimming uses the pectorial muscles doesn't it? Trying to firm up, see if I can enhance my cleavage any more! ;-)

 
You may notice that the boobcam has been removed from the side-bar. Don't worry though, it's not gone for good! A lot of people wrote to me to reassure me that the point of the boobcam was not lost on all our visitors - many of you do see it as the representation of my breast-confidence - and I don't want to abandon the idea altogether. However, this site is not just about looking at tits, so I'm changing the boobcam arrangements. One of the possible directions for the boobcam is to make it a calendar, with a new photo every month. I'm going to think it over, and I'll get back to you.

 
Speaking of Zine articles, I haven't written one myself for a while, though I did expand the Breast Confidence one to go on Double-D.com. I think the next one will be on the media, possibly how it affects the way women see their breasts? Or perhaps I'll do a piece on plastic surgery.

 
Just added three new articles to the Breast Chronicles Zine! The first is about the representation of Breasts in Comic Books. We also have one on Breast Size: getting used to your chest. And finally, a completely different point of view than ever before: Breasts as Functional Hardware, a first-person account of breast-feeding. I am running a little behind on adding submitted articles to the site (still catching up after the holidays), so if you have send me an article do feel free to remind me to publish it (please also tell me what by-line you would like it run under).


 
Looking at the high-fashion designer gear of late, it seems that as part of the small-breasted backlash against buxom beauties, scant thought is given to those of us who like to have that extra bit of support up top. Fashion is daring to bare with plunge necklines and backless styles, but there's no hope of concealing a bra in there!

 
These men think they know more about your bra than you do. But do they? Men seem to think that a bra has to represent something - the men in this article are trying to sell us lingerie with images of 'girl-power' and suchlike - when all we really want is a bra. We will decide for ourselves if the bra is sexy and to be used in seduction - all we want to know is whether it's comfortable and comes in the right size. More info on the ad campaign in question can be found here.


 
Perhaps I should try for a career in plus-size lingerie modelling? Personally, I always feel somehow cheated when the plus-size lingerie manufacturers use surgically-enhanced models like Kelly Brook, Jordan and Nell McAndrew to advertise their products, instead of naturally large girls. For me, it kind of defeats the object, which in many ways is to make larger girls feel better (and more 'normal') about their size.

 
You'll be wishing you'd seen the Olympic water polo matches after reading this! If you needed proof over the Cultural Divide over Cleavage, this is it! Europeans put winning above the minor consideration of flashing a bit of breast, whereas for Americans and Australians, modesty comes first.


 
Asset Management takes a look at fashion's whim-driven love affair with breasts over the last century or so, citing examples from Marilyn Monroe to Twiggy among the various 'ideal' figures in the last hundred years.

 
This article on Finding Your Size confirms exactly what I have said in the past: that many women, as their bust grows, buy a larger back size instead of moving up to the next cup size.

 
Now this is more what I'm talking about! Prejudice Against Big-Breasted Women says that an estimated 40% of women wear a D-cup or above - that's nearer what I've always believed to be the case. And we're still supposedly not 'normal'. Of course attitudes towards big breasts need to change. I also like the sound of the fact that the fashion industry is being asked to sit up and take notice - by someone other than me!

 
How about The Shape of Things to Come for some positive body image? I suppose it's going in the right direction, at least...

 
Here you go, why don't you all follow the example of Chandler and write in to FHM and suggest they give me money to go sunbathe naked on tropical beaches in exchange for getting my tits out in the magazine.

 
So, tomorrow will be the breasts' first outing as the means for a sociological experiment. However, as their owner (that's me) is incredibly inexperienced at this sort of thing, I can't guarantee any results.

 
My goodness - my breasts and I have made the papers! This is an article from the Evening Standard in which various blogs - including the Breast Chronicles - are mentioned.

 
Youch! If ever there was a reason not to undergo breast augmentation surgery, this is it! As you may or may not already be aware (depending on how much of this site you've read), I am strongly opposed to breast implants for any reason other than reconstruction work after breast cancer treatment. (link from GeekGrrl Log)


 
You know what? It's quite funny to read the misconceptions about the effect breasts can have on attracting men. Some women say that their boobs are too small to attract guys, despite being C-cups. Some large-breasted women claim that it is their breasts that help them to attract blokes (misquote: "I can't understand how you don't attract men, with 34C breasts"). Some large-breasted women (ie me) have been chatted up only a handful of times. Some small-breasted girls declare that they have never had any problems with attracting a boyfriend. This can only go to prove that, well, breast size doesn't matter. Which of course is true - although of course breasts themselves can be an important factor if you play it right.

 
Further to yesterday's breast-acceptance post, I'd suggest reading the notice board, a forum for discussion of breasts and body-image.

 
An interesting suggestion from Giles - to find out how much I can achieve with my breasts.


 
Well, how do we define sexy breasts? Is it how they look in clothes? Is it how they look naked? Is it the size or the shape? What is sexy? Myself, I find nipples pretty interesting. The unique shapes, sizes, colors. Nipples make or break beautiful breasts, in my opinion. And unlike the rest of the breast, you can't fake them! At least you couldn't, until now. An American company has come up with an interesting accessory, fake nipples! You wear these lifelike pacifiers with a bra which, with a little suction, holds them in place.

 
Too big, too small, lumpy, or just plain average. Five women reveal how they came to terms with their breasts -- or not. Funny though, that a 34C woman is complaining about her 'large breasts' and considering reductive surgery! But here's the busty woman who flat refuses to complain about her size - you go girl! ;-)


 
Although it is based primarily on the whole body rather than just the breasts, this article on why men prefer larger women makes a good point of the unnaturalness of large breasts on a small frame without the hips to balance them out. Personally, I think that although this ought to be true, it isn't for the simple fact that implanted breasts are such a common sight nowadays that they're more the norm than naturally curvy women. It's only one step from the naturally curvy, hourglass figures being considered abnormal. I'm serious.

 
Several of the points in this article on dealing with breast cancer can be applied to all women with a breast / body image problem. It's a pity it's in such a narrow column, resulting in an extremely lengthy page and a lot of scrolling.

 
Heh, I almost don't need to write this weblog - the running commentary by King Stormtrooper is often more entertaining than what I could come up with! Today the facts according to KS are as follows: My breasts are ugly, they're not even real, and besides that they're not mine anyway! Gotta love it =)


 
This is the website of a Channel 4 production called Private Parts: Breasts. It's got a bit of technical information etc etc.

 
I find this very interesting, by the way: How life would be if men had breasts. I could actually believe a lot of them, too.

 
Celebrity soundbites on the subject of breasts (I can't seem to access them - let me know if they're interesting!)

 
An interesting subject (and one I touched on in my 'breast etymology' article, albeit briefly): Breast Slang. It's astonishing how many different terms people can come up with for a pair of mammary glands!

 
Women.com has a series of surveys taken in New York about Breast Perception.


 
Here's a series of articles that may be worth a quick read. Do breast creams work?; Would you change your breasts?; Get it off your chest; Feeding your boobs.


 
Yes, it is indeed true that most of the people who care one way or the other about the boobcam are blokes. I haven't totally ruled out keeping it, but I think really that it is surplus to requirements now that the site has developed into something more than attention-seeking.

 
Lacey Brazeer feminist comic strip =). Her secret weapon is Breast Power. To quote: "What is Breast Power, you ask? It's confidence; it's taking care of your body and health; it's making that chump in the bar look you in the eye instead of at your cleavage; it's looking forward to, not dreading, the changes that come with aging. Simply put, Breast Power is what this women's champion is all about".


 
Here's an interesting poll on breasts in the workplace. To be honest, I don't think the results reflect anything other than the fact that average bra size is supposedly a B-cup.


 
The inventor of the bra? It was not at all a Mr. Otto Titzling (with the help of his assistant Hans Delving) - I mean come on - it should be blatantly obvious by the name that this is pure fantasy! I can't believe the number occasions where I've seen it claimed that Titzling was the creator of the bra. I find it incredibly amusing that people actually buy this far-fetched story! So I have to conclude that, though it would make an amusing etymological history, the Titzling story is a fabrication. =)

 
Right, I hereby announce that the 'boobcam' is being withdrawn. I apologise to those who recognise it for what it is - a bit of fun - but it seems to be detracting from the point of the site and I just can't be bothered with it any more. Oh and for goodness sake, when did I claim to be a martyr? The criticism is getting very tiresome, and I'm currently only a few steps away from an overly dramatic "I can't cope with it any more" and shutting the site down. However, don't get your hopes up, as I usually enjoy running the Breast Chronicles, and receiving the positive feedback it generates.


 
A good many people have written to me or signed my guestbook, commenting that breasts are 'just part of the body'. I disagree - breasts are objectified in Western culture, making them a lot more than 'just' another body part. They are very important to women in many ways - sexually, socially and biologically (to name but a few). Losing one or both breasts can be an extremely traumatic experience for a breast cancer patient, don't forget. Don't underestimate the importance of breasts - and don't bother pointing out they don't usually matter in sexual attraction, because that's only a small part of it.

 
For those who, like me, fancy the idea of sewing themselves some made-to-measure garments, the books Sewing Lingerie and Lingerie Secrets: Sew a Perfect Fit for Every Body might be of interest.

 
I'm not sure about the practicalities of wearing such a contraption, but the Cameo half cup bra will certainly keep you well exposed!

 
It's a sad fact that over 70% of women are wearing the wrong size bra. It's incredibly important to wear a bra that really fits - for reasons of both health and figure. But even trained fitters cannot always get an accurate result (unless your breasts naturally stick straight forward, in which case you hardly need a bra anyway!) The fitting page at Bras for Body & Soul says this: "By being fitted properly in a bra that is engineered to work for her, not against her, each woman's posture is enhanced, self-esteem is boosted, breast circulation is facilitated, her back is supported and she looks and feels her best".

 
Bras for Body & Soul is a specialty bra shop and extended services for all women, including women who have had breast surgery. Its aim is to make a positive difference. The site is worth a read through, and if you're in the right area, I would recommend some of these Workshops.

 
Wow, I'm published! How exciting - it's the first time something I've written has been published by anyone other than myself! Bear in mind that this is not a permanent fixture, so in time it will be replaced by another article and this entry will be out of date.


 
The Breast Chronicles' barefoot buddy Giles has joined the supporters of Double-D.com.


 
Beth wrote to me to invite me (and my readers) to read an entry in her weblog about Medscape article on breast implants.

 
Whip 'Em Out Wednesdays! A woman gave new meaning to the term "boob tube" by flashing her bare breasts on live television. The stunt was part of a New York City radio show's "Whip 'Em Out Wednesdays" or "W.O.W." promotion that "rewards" any woman who exposes herself when she sees the "W.O.W." bumper sticker.


 
Award Show Mammories! (sic) The author says that both over- and underdeveloped female celebrities are flashing alot of flesh at award shows. In appropriate circumstances I also enjoy flaunting my gift(s). That's because breasts are a front-and-center symbol of femininity, and cleavage has a way of stoking your sensuality and filling you with a sexy confidence. After all, God wouldn't have given you maracas if She didn't want you to shake them!


 
Sunbathing weather - yippee!... um... so why am I inside sitting at a computer?!


 
Happy Birthday, Mr. President! A woman pulls off her shirt in front of friends and President Clinton after he autographed it.


 
For a change, here's a link for the less buxom among our readers. Decollete Enhancement sells breast enhances, push-up bras, clothes and lingerie, aimed at 'smaller' women.


 
The breasts are immensely excited about Ash's impending return to Britain. The rest of me can hardly wait, too!

 
What's your Bra IQ? I got most of the ones which didn't involve dates. I've always been hopeless at remembering which years stuff happened in. But I remember film stars - Jane Russell, Lana Turner (the Sweater Girl), Marilyn... I maintain that I was born 50 years too late. I'd have had a near-perfect body by the standards of the 1950s.


 
Erica has large breasts, and her grandmother was diagnosed with breast cancer some months ago. For these reasons she supports the campaign at Double-D.com.

 
So far this holiday I have spent a total of: 2 weeks in Canterbury, 1 week in Wales, 2 weeks in Scotland, 2 weeks in Canada, 1 week in Selsdon, and 1 week in Bath. That is why there has not been a new boobcam photo in some time. When I get my life back to normal, I assure you there will be a steady stream of cleavage to amuse you =)

 
I'm reminded that we don't yet have an article on the subject of breast cancer. If anyone wishes to submit one, to be published as part of the Breast Chronicles 'Zine, please send it to breastchronicles@ezine.co.uk.

 
Still within the theme (it's Breast Cancer Awareness Day on the Breast Chronicles!), is this article from Fabula magazine, about the public response to the TBFC ad campaign, Obsessed with Breasts, in which models seductively flash their mastectomy scars. I'm not sure if this article is a permanent fixture (it looks as though it might not be, judging by the url), so read it while you have the chance.

 
For anyone who doesn't think they have enough up top, Inflatable Boobs seem a rather cheaper alternative to surgery!

 
My friend Jay has become the first to take me up on the bribe of a link in exchange for supporting breast cancer research. He is joined by Kate, who had never heard of Double-D.com before, but wants to support the campaign and encourages women to purchase there.


 
Even more of a reason to buy stuff at Double-D.com - they're giving 50p from every order to breast cancer research (and an extra 10 if the order is over 150 - so people can fund raise by pooling orders). And here's a mini-incentive for supporting the cause: if you link to Double-D.com, including on your site an explanation of your reason for doing so, e-mail me and I'll mention you on the Breast Chronicles (that sounds arrogant, but this site has a fair few hits, and people often contact me, grateful for the exposure I give them).

double-d.com - supporting you
and breast cancer research

 
Bridge-builders tackle the bra problem. Who says bra design isn't a feat of engineering?!

 
Well, if you do fancy the idea of false nipples, try bodyperks.com. I always thought it was rather 'improper' to allow your erect nipples to be visible through clothing... ah well!


   
As a part of the Breasts of Doom team, I suppose I should contribute to the collabs really. I like their topics - I might catch up, with some of the old titles. This month it's "How do you feel about showing off your breasts, e.g., flashing, very low-cut shirts, etc.? Is it trashy, a part of life, or something you do only when you're drunk?" It should make for an interesting piece. I'm going to add Breasts of Doom to my links too - don't know why I haven't yet got round to it.


 
Hm, fake nipples is all it takes huh? It is certainly true that the nipple is acceptate as being the 'rude bit' of the breast - a breast is considered to be naked if the areola is showing (covering the whole breast apart from the areola would not be allowed, but bikini tops so small that they barely offer any covering are perfectly welcome in society).

 
Question: If someone publishes naked pictures of themselves on the internet, and I don't consider her attractive, will saying so make me a) right, b) questionable or c) bitchy? I'm inclined to believe that if I express a negative opinion about any other female or her breasts, I'll be accused of being bitchy. It's just a thought.

 
Well I'm afraid the breasts have no interesting news to share with the world today, other than to say that there's still no plan to offer nudity on the boobcam. Not until FHM publishes me will I be seen naked (by anyone other than my friends).


 
grr, what with all this webring/yahoo integration, I'm most likely going to have to move the (oYo) webring to ringsurf.com or something.

 
How have I not thought of visiting Double-D.com before?! Oh, I love this place - I can pay with switch, they have gorgeous gorgeous stuff... and on every order form the default size value is 34DD!

 
A happy customer wrote to me to introduce me to the delights of cleverpants.com - now this is a site I can't wait to look through thoroughly! It's apparently the only UK site to carry some of its available labels.